Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
Randomize
