i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
My 40 year old neighbors are throwing a party for their eight year old niece's birthday. It's 1am and they're still partying hard. Harder than me. It's Saturday. Just say it, I'm a disgrace to the generation.
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
Dude you picked up her Chihuahua and threatened to kill it yelling "it's not cinco de mayo, bitches"
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
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