i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
I found your pet lobster in the bathroom this morning. I went to return it to you but it escaped.
For future reference "I'm too drunk to come today" is an acceptable line to get out of work. I love my job
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
Blow job season was short but glorious.
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
Sext me about skeletons
I prefer to think of hangovers as extreme sobriety, which can only be cured by more booze
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Randomize