TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
I didn't wake up drunk this year...I must be getting soft
Yeah I guess quad-fisting Miller Lites just isn't as effective as it used to be
Death by dick. An honorable death. Put a picture of his dick in the photo collage at my funeral.
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
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