butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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