Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
I found a horn on the street but it's okay I disinfected it with vodka
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
This is my gift to your gina
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
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