Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
things i am: 1) still drunk 2) still wearing my leopard onesie 3) still gonna make my 9am lecture despite the odds CAN I GET A HIGH FIVE
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
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