I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
I barely trust you with my tinder, why would I let you take the staples out of my head?!
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
Randomize
