okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
Tomorrow's Mother's Day and the only thing I can afford is beer and the McDonalds dollar menu. Do you think a Budweiser and a Big Mac says thank you for me fucking up your life since 1990?
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
Randomize
