ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
Man, only now that I'm single is it painfully obvious that I have zero booty calls in waiting. This could be a cold winter
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
I got the shit slapped outta me last night but the pain in my jaw doesn’t even compare to the hangover I have.
Randomize
