There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
here I sit at Southern Illinois' finest pubs and I thought I heard your laugh. I was sadly astonished to turn and find a midget cracking herself up reading the label on her can of chewing tobacco...
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
Dude. I'm no longer allowed to use my sword when drinking. I just spent 20 min cleaning up popcorn. I stabbed Moe in the leg and chopped his door knob off
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
They were out of watermelon smirnoff, so we got you a fifth of 5 o'clock and an actual watermelon.
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
Randomize
