i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
Randomize
