A little boy walked by his parents room one night, looked through the keyhole, and said "and that bitch tells me to stop sucking my thumb!"
just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
So I made him an imaginary sandwich and told him that the day I didn't have to fake it, neither would he.
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
Randomize
