but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
I thought I broke my iPhone. I was almost as depressed as the day I broke my vibrator.
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
I just threw up over a bridge. I didn't even know there was a bridge in this town. Vodka is like a transportation device.
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
Randomize
