i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
Oh my god. I opened up my microwave and there was a pile of bacon in it. It's like my mother knew I'd be hungover.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
sex in a hospital.. check
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
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