my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
There is a 1000000% chance you'll be turned down if you try coming on to me while I watch Star Wars.
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
Why are your pants in the freezer?
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
Randomize
