i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
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