May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
Are my feet made of real feet?
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
WHY THE FUCK IS MY BATH TUB FILLED WITH MUD?!
1. You were drunk 2. You wanted a mud bath\n3. We tried to talk you out of it, but you kept throwing dirt at us
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
Randomize