When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
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