nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
You've got to be fucking kidding me. Do you think "Husband drunkenly pees all over floors" is reasonable grounds for divorce? So pissed off right now.
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
Randomize
