do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
Randomize
