thus making me awesome and them whores
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
My right boob is officially about a handful while my left is 1 and 3/4 handfuls. I'm staring at the mirror falling into a deep depression.
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
Randomize
