You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
I've been drunk in my life. But I've never been "crying in 5 Guys at 1 in the afternoon" drunk
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Randomize
