Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose.
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
Randomize