idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
So this text is costing me two dollars because I'm out of the country, but I just wanted to let you know it went well with the stripper last night
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
You know that girl that climbed through my window and got in my bed with me and fucked me? It turns out she was real and has a real boyfriend who is real pissed
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
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