i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
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