ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
Did you put pizza in my boxers last night?
I left you 4 hours ago. Have you been walking around with shit in your pants all day?
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
Randomize
