i just had 3 doubles lined up on top of a urinal, texting with one hand and my dick in the other. I an fucking awesome.
It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
You stole a frozen pizza from the freezer, stuffed it in the back of your shirt then proceeded to leave the party.
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
my poor anus
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
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