awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
if women knew the size of my dick, theyd be much more receptive to my sloppy drunken advances
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
Pandora played an ad for a free trial for an abortion pill if you’ve had unprotected sex in the last 2-3 days and then Lucky came on... I literally am dying laughing
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
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