At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Randomize
