so now that im really awake i see that my underwear are completely ripped down the side, my shorts are on backwards, i have to go get plan b....i call last night an epic fail or success depending on how catholic i am feeling
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
Threesome in a minivan. New low
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
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