She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
My boyfriend texted me as I was texting some random hookup from last night. His text: "Morning baby" My response: "Your cum is in my hair"
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
In sex ed. they really need to include a lesson on saying tampon in foreign languages, just in case.... Trying to ask the woman at the reception desk, who barely speaks English, for one just turned into an awkward game of charades.
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
Randomize
