Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
Went up to some dude that hit on Laura and told him he has a voice like a grandma. Apparently didnt have muscles or kindness like grandma so can you pick me up at the ER please?
The gate guard just said to me, "I almost didn't recognize you in uniform. Welcome back." I think I need to lay off the booze.
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
Randomize