Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
Sexting gets boring after a while. I'm eating a sandwich right now and googling 'sexting ideas' and just copy/pasting lines.
It's a good sandwich though.
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
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