I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
I'm still pretty drunk right now, but when this hangover hits me, I'm going to be super pissed. It's a preemptive never drinking again.
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
Randomize
