I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
So I'm eating my burger minding my own business, when the guy next to me starts up a conversation. Seemed normal at first, stocks, bonds, etc...then he said...and I quote "I can push a bowling-ball up a flight of stairs with my tongue." As I awkwardly laughed he broke out "I bet you I could bite the head off of a rabbit."
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Randomize
