My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
i told him the only way i'd fuck him was if he saved me during the zombie apocolypse and took me to a tastefully decorated yet impenetrable hideout.
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
Randomize
