Charged a drink to your name last night. Thanks for the whiskey
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
Guess the answer to the last 2 texts right and you'll get a boob shot tonight. Guess wrong and it will be a picture of a used, boogery kleenex.
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
Randomize
