ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
One of my residents in my hall just found my positive pregnancy test from last year I hid behind the fridge, I'm just going to tell them it was for a science project.
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
He came up there while i was bartending, ate a salad, told me he wanted to divorce me, then tipped me 10 dollars....
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
All I remember is talking the cops into calling us a cab instead of giving us PIs while trying to wake up your passed-out-on-a-bench ass.
Randomize
