I can tuck mytits in my pants
I was in the bathroom and her cat just looked at my penis with a profound hatred.
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
Randomize
