last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
I set the bag of cheetos on the open box on my coffee table while I was watching TV. I was so high I ate half of the styrofoam peanuts in the box by accident. Am I going to die?
I hope so
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
Randomize
