so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
Randomize
