Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
We need to rekindle our bromance
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
I am naked and annoyed.
You know you're good at multi-tasking if you can get a lap dance from someone while simultaneously eating a burrito.
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
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