Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
Randomize
