we have officially lost it.
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
what are we doing this weekend?
I have enough booze to get us through Armageddon...which basically means that on Sunday we will have to make a trip to the liquor store.
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
Randomize
