Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
What is this red stuff in a water bottle in my fridge that's labeled "not for baby turtles"?
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
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