Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
Couch. On fire.
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
Randomize
