I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
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