I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
I've never seen anyone as high as you were.. you collapsed onto the kitchen floor hugging a tub of ice cream. You named it phil.
Someone signed my nipple.
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
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