just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
Randomize
