This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
Also I told several people at the bar last night that my dad the alligator wrestler died wrestling an alligator. So if anyone asks that's real.
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
