that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
Randomize
